Waking up to kiss you and nobody's there.

The smell of your cologne stuck in the air.

It's hard...

    It's hard when someone takes over a place within your heart and then, one day, without a word or explanation, they disappear. Phone calls go unanswered, text messages go ignoredb and they decide that they don't need you to be a part of their world anymore. So, they jettison themselves as far apart as they are able, to escape the commitment you once believed they had given, which you held so closely to your heart, leaving a gaping space inside where their prescence had once lingered...

   Yesterday, I thought I saw your shadow running 'round.

 It's funny how things never change in this old town.

So far from the stars...

If the whole world was watching, I'd still dance with you. 

Drive highways and byways to be there with you.

Over and over, the only truth... 

Everything comes back to you.

    No matter how I try to escape, to forget, to move forward with my own life, I still find myself trapped inside of your world. A world of narcissism and meaningless relations that would allow you to live forever within your youth. Even as I find success in my career and my education, my romantic life remains frozen in the photograph of what once was. Every dream of you that haunts me each night. Every dream comes back to you...

I saw that you moved on with someone new.

In the pub where we met with her arms around you. 

It's still so hard...

    You said things would be different when you arrived home, and like a perfect fool, I believed it. You told me she would return to the place she called home herself,... far away from the town we had always known so well. Until she was suddenly here. She was suddenly everywhere. She wasn't going to simply vanish... she had no plans to. She had gained total control over you...

After three months of working sided by side with you, her vines of madness slithering beneath your skin to become a part of your very essence...           

'How could I combat her?'

And, I know that it's wrong

That I can't move on. 

But, there's something about you....

Something about you continues to haunt me. Your memory escorts me throughout my day, sweetly taking my arm to guide me along this psth of broken memories, like the gentleman I had always wished for you to become.

I need to break away from the games and release myself from your controlling, self serving grip. I meed to be free. But, there's something about you that keeps me entangled in your puzzling web of deceit. The hopes for you to one day transform into a a kind, compassionate person because I have witnessed him before, with another... the hope that, one day, you may turn to finally understand how much I truly care...

But, that is when I realize how naive I can be, as you laugh with her in agreement. My heart was never yours because you never wanted it, in the first place. I fell for the mystery, the dimpled smiles, the games...

And, I want to tell you everything, The words I never got to say the first time around.

And, I remember everything from when we were children playing in this fairground.

I wish I was there with you now...

    I wish that I had the courage to tell you what I should have in the first place... That a small piece of my heart would always stay in those few brief moments when we were together. I wish I could find a way to return to that first night and keep it a while longer. In a time where there was no pain, no heartache, no deceit. When I knew that I could trust you...

 I wish you could have been the person that I always believed you were. Before you had shattered that illusion... with a perfectly crafted lie...

The most excruciating part still being the microscopic portion of my soul that waits ever so patiently, in the hopes that you may one day realize I have never been far, a mere two steps behind...

I have always been the "option" who never truly walked away... 

    If you never do, I will find a way to be happy and you will still have your freedom...

Everything Comes Back To You...

"This Town" - Niall Horan, Daniel John Donald Bryer, Michael David Needle, Jamie Scott

Image: Shutterstock