Sometimes I miss my old life. I was breathless, unaware and new. I was forever looking forward, hopeful. I believed in the power of romantic love…that two people can do anything if they commit to love one another forever.
I don’t live there anymore. But sometimes, I miss it.
My teens and twenties were filled up with fantasies that someone (my boyfriend) would complete me. He’d adore me, lavish me with gifts, we’d get married, have babies, I’d be thinner and life would be…Continue
Heaven knows I have done it. Since a young age I have used food as a weapon. I have hurt myself on purpose with it.
For years it was a matter of handling my feelings (mostly guilt) by eating and then purging. It was a behaviour I could throw myself into, get lost in and block out everything else. It was a kind of mania. I was most certainly insane. And I was violent, if only towards myself.
And then later came a very restrictive food plan. To a person with a healthy…Continue
If I could tell him one thing, it would be this: be who you are, now. I can tell him, but not without that lingering notion that I don’t really mean it. I can tell him, but not yet without the tears in my eyes.
If I could say one last thing, it would be this: love you who are, now…right now. I can tell him, but he’s not ready. I can say the words, but he thinks me biased, blinded by preciousness.
I tell you this: I have seen unconditional love. I have held it tightly only…Continue
I’m writing a novel. It’s a lovely, thrilling and really f**king scary experience. Why is it scary? Oh, well because I am totally afraid that it will SUCK. Huge.
I have been writing on a regular basis for two years. I’ve been blogging, writing poetry and working on a memoir in that time. And then, all of a sudden my friendMeredith mentions this insane thing called National Novel Writing Month. It’s…Continue