Sometimes I think I must be mad.
I have a therapy practice. My clients are often in desperate places. I'm on my own. The work is always challenging me. I've written for more than a decade, and have had more than a decade of rejections and vulnerability and self-doubt. If wouldn't want to work out how much I've earned for every hour I've worked. My spiritual practice as a Buddhist encourages me to follow precepts, to dissolve my ego, to be humble. I go on retreats and yukky stuff bubbles up. I grow things. Slugs eat my seedlings. Deer eat my tulips. It's hard work.
At other times, I feel blessed.
Like last night, driving home after two amazing sessions with long term clients. What a privilege, to be there with them for a part of their journey. Like this morning, writing this blog, and working on my novel, and getting emails from people who appreciate what I do. Like after meditating, when my mind begins to settle and I can see everything just a little bit more clearly. Like the days I slice glossy courgettes from their plants with a sharp knife, and fry them in butter with my own fragrant garlic.
The threads are really golden threads.
This is one of my favourite quotes, which I plucked from an old blog, eclectic garden. I've carried these words around with me for a long time now. Their edges have been worn down by my reading them like a beach-washed stone, and they are even more beautiful than they were.
“When you're hanging on by a thread, identify that thread and do all you can to strengthen it. Gardening is my thread, consistently providing therapy through years of ups and downs. If this blink in time seems a bit crazier, well, perhaps it is. Gardening serves as a gentle reminder that the wheel turns and seasons come and go, each filled with its own impossibly tender beauty. So maybe it's time to go outside and look for tulip noses poking through the damp earth and reaching into the winter mist.” ~Sally Basile
When you're hanging on by a thread, identify that thread and do all you can to strengthen it. If you're reading this then my guess is that one of your threads, one of the things you love, is WORDS.
I wish you luck in finding your own threads. I'm supported by so many, I could lift up both my feet and I wouldn't fall over.
"The course met and exceeded my expectations. Fiona’s weekly essays, questions and list of resources, as well as her daily emails, provided a wealth of thought provoking material as well as inspiration and support for my writing and life."
~ Kath Powell, e-course participant
If you’d like to work on finding and strengthening your own threads during October, join me for my e-course The Art of Paying Attention, in partnership with She Writes. Click here to find out more and register for the class. Registration ends tomorrow.
“Thank you for the work you do and the loving way in which you do it. You’re making a positive difference in the lives of many people.”
~ Robin Turner, e-course participant