This week, Paula Kamen—author of Finding Iris Chang, about her own quest to understand her friend’s mysterious suicide—asks Katherine Shonk—author of Happy Now? (Farrar, Straus & Giroux), a new tragicomic novel reviewed recently in the New York Times about a woman putting her life back together after her husband’s suicide—about black comedy, online dating, grad school, and motherhood.

1. It’s interesting how novelists can get their ideas in round-about and even idiosyncratic ways. Happy Now? is about a woman whose husband kills himself on Valentine’s Day. How did you think of the idea for the plot? In what way was any past (admittedly) bad taste in men involved? What about online dating, which your main character Claire had done in spades?

I knew that I wanted to write a book that readers would (with any luck) respond to on an emotional level, as that’s always my most important goal when writing—otherwise, why bother? So I was, in a sense, actively shopping for a tragedy that I could sink my teeth into. This search happened to dovetail with my own then-fruitless experiences shopping for a husband in my mid-30s. As you so kindly point out, my taste in men at the time was pretty bad. The siren song of the depressed man—who I would save, of course—was especially irresistible to me. I became compelled by the idea of writing about a woman who willfully overlooks clear warning signs and, later, is forced to confront her denial.

As for online dating, I did a lot of it. I accumulated some amusing stories, some of which I adapted for Claire. I should mention, by the way, that almost everyone I met was really, really nice, and most of them were quite sane. But it took several years of intensive dating before I became seriously interested in one of the nice, sane guys—and then only after breaking things off with him once.

2. This novel has an edge of black humor, such as Claire’s husband committing suicide on Valentine’s Day, and Claire’s first therapy appointment happening in the same building that houses the American Girl Place. How important is humor to this book, and do critics tend to overlook that because you’re a “serious” writer?

My favorite writing is both funny and dark; Lorrie Moore and Flannery O’Connor are probably my two favorite writers. To me, it would seem false to write a novel about suicide, or any other serious topic, that doesn’t have an edge of humor. Because, as you know, humor crops up during our darkest moments—your two most recent books, one about your friend’s suicide (Finding Iris Chang) and the other about your chronic migraine (All in My Head), are both poignant and funny. In addition to being devastated, my character, Claire, sees the absurdity of her situation—in fact, she feels embarrassed by it—and she’s annoyed when those around her seem shocked when she tells bad jokes.

So far, most reviewers have found the novel to be funny, or at least “biting” or “wry.” The New York Times focused more on the serious side of the book, and thoughtfully so. I think it’s possible the topic of suicide could cause people to overlook the intended humor. If I had to choose, I’d prefer readers to be moved than to laugh.

3. You weren’t a creative writing major as an undergraduate (at our mutual alma mater, the University of Illinois), where you graduated in 1990. What did you major in, and does that major still come in handy with your writing?

I majored in psychology. I eventually realized that I was interested in people, but not necessarily in helping them. (That sounds bad, but truly, it’s better for everyone that I’m not a therapist.) I took some writing classes my senior year and decided pretty quickly that I’d found my true love. But I’m still really interested in psychology, which plays a major role in Happy Now? for obvious reasons. Literary fiction is inherently psychological, but instead of helping people, you throw obstacles in their path. And I’m not afraid to admit that writing has helped me work out some of my own issues.

4. I know you got a MA in creative writing from the University of Texas in 1999. What was the most useful thing you learned there? Did that lead in any way to your first book, the collection of short stories, The Red Passport, which came out in 2003? Would you recommend a MFA to other aspiring novelists?

The timing worked out well for me, since I went to Texas soon after spending a momentous year in Russia. I spent a couple years holed up in my apartment in Austin writing the stories in my collection, working through the somewhat traumatic but wildly exciting experience of living in a strange (very strange!) land. I recommend getting an MFA to anyone who needs a solid block of time to write. Go when you’re self-motivated and have a lot to say. Consider going to a state school where the student loans will be manageable. If you end up with good teachers and a nice group of students, that’s gravy.

5. I know you’re married now and expecting a baby in July at the age of 41. (And, at a similar age, I also recently married one of those previously overlooked nice-guy types, and knocked out two babies myself.) How do you think your new marriage and new daughter will influence your writing later on? What does your chef husband think of your book; do you see commonalities in your careers?

I expect that having a baby will be the ultimate excuse for not writing, which is exciting. Seriously, I’m sure it will be tough, since I also work full time as an editor (though from home, at least). I appreciated the advice you gave me recently about enjoying my daughter while she is young and not pressuring myself to write, lest I stress myself out. Though I’m sure it’ll be tiring to be a first-time mom in my early 40s, the upside is that I’ve already had a full life and won’t feel prematurely tied down. And I expect that being a mother will open up new emotions and experiences that may be worth transforming into fiction.

Victor, my husband, is not much of a reader, but he liked the book. And he enjoyed telling people at our wedding that I’d just finished writing a book about a woman whose husband kills himself. I like being married to someone who doesn’t have a personal investment in publishing and who is content to root from the sidelines. We are both in creative fields, and I think we understand each other’s creative process to some degree. But he has the opportunity to show off his creativity every night, whereas I’ve only put out two books so far. That difference may help to explain why both chefs and writers are commonly thought of as crazy, but in different ways.

Find Katharine Shonk here.
Find Paula Kamen here.