If I could tell him one thing, it would be this: be who you are, now.  I can tell him, but not without that lingering notion that I don’t really mean it. I can tell him, but not yet without the tears in my eyes.

If I could say one last thing, it would be this: love you who are, now…right now.  I can tell him, but he’s not ready.  I can say the words, but he thinks me biased, blinded by preciousness.

I tell you this: I have seen unconditional love.  I have held it tightly only to let it fly.  I have danced with it until my feet were bruised and bloodied.  I have taken it on as me.

And then I get scared.

Yet above and below there is a sense that we are safe.  I bleed into it sometimes.  I feel pushed by it.  The unconditional love is there.  It is a well I draw from on instinct.  When I look in his eyes, I drink from that well.  We live there, I think.  But we forget.

So I’ll tell him all I feel compelled to in silence.  I will whisper it as a prayer to this soft, yet empty room.  I will let my words bounce gently off the walls and gather them up as light kisses on my skin.

And I will know: I can be who I am, now.  I can love who I am, now…right now.

And all is unfolding just as it should.

Indeed, I cannot be anything but what I am.

---

http://danielleboonstra.com

I am the author of Without Fear of Falling, my first novel due out in April 2013.

Views: 10

Tags: communication, love, marriage, pain, self-love

Comment

You need to be a member of She Writes to add comments!

Join She Writes

Latest Activity

Terrie Lynn liked Brooke Warner's blog post The 10 Biggest Mistakes New Authors Make
4 minutes ago
Sherry Alexander posted a status
"Working on my PB, and just finished my fist YA novel. Life doesn't get any better."
10 minutes ago
Jo Anne Valentine Simson commented on the blog post 'The 10 Biggest Mistakes New Authors Make'
"Great suggestions! I've made a couple of those mistakes - especially on my second book. It's a live-and-learn life!"
20 minutes ago
Jo Anne Valentine Simson liked Brooke Warner's blog post The 10 Biggest Mistakes New Authors Make
21 minutes ago

Members

Badge

Loading…

© 2014   Created by Kamy Wicoff.

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service