If I had to
start writing a blog what would I write about? You see, I am an
Israeli-American woman, who is never sure where she should be living, in the US
or in Israel. It seems that my feelings are always divided, influenced by the
politics (sometimes like it here, sometimes there), the time of the year (I
vote for winters over there, while summers definitely for the Northwest), Holidays
(definitely like it there. Oh wait, I just remembered how I hated the family pressure,
so maybe I like celebrating my Holliday here...), and I dislike the distance...
It is hard to live thousands of miles away from your elderly parents, siblings,
and nephews. When I am here I feel so Israeli, and when I am there I sometimes feel
like I do not belong anymore.  

Did I mention
I am mother of four boys? I am, really a mother of four boys, and my boys
always tell everyone how I tried for a girl four times. The truth is I did want
four girls, but the reason would sound unusual for someone who was not born in
the Holly Land, where everyone is obligated to serve in the Army, and I was always
a worrier, and thought about being afraid to send my boys to fight. I guess
this is pretty selfish, I admit, but not every feeling we have is under our
control, and yet, as I already told you, I ended up having four adorable boys
ages 18, 15, 12 and 7.  

Life is
packed, and life is complicated. Next week my oldest son is graduating from High
school. He is eighteen and is off to College in the fall. My son has learning
disabilities, and since he was in first grade he had to work extra hard just to
be able to make it, and next week he is graduating, and not only he is
graduating, he was accepted to one of the finest schools in the Northwest. I
know I need to carry with me tons of tissues, since I am going to sob there,
and I really do not care if I am going to embarrass myself or him, after all, I
do deserve at least one good cry of pride and delight. After the graduation he
will say goodbye to us, and go work all summer in a Summer Camp.

I do not
know how other mothers feel about their kids leaving home. I know that this is
going to be really tuff. I love having all these boys’ energy around me, lots
of good laughters, active games, and yes lots of farts too, but this is all a
part of having all boys surrounding you. In just a few weeks my oldest son will
leave home, when he was born his weight was less than 5 ponds, and now he is a
fine young man. I will have less laundry to do, and more driving to do, since
he helps driving his brothers (a good kid, did I mention that?), oh my god it
is unbearable even to think about it. How do you all do it? Am I the only one
ready to go back to College just to be with him? I am telling you, I would if I

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Comment by Revital Horowitz on May 30, 2011 at 9:07am

Hey Sara


Thnaks for visiting my blog. i will take your ideas very seriously, promiss, and i am sure that girls are fun, aren`t we fun???

Comment by Sakki selznick on May 30, 2011 at 9:01am

Dear Revitai,


The thing you did wrong is to prep him for college. Keep them blue-collar and they'll stay close to home. (Ha.)

Sara Selznick, with children still a good eight and fourteen years away from leaving home, so lots, still of fart jokes and "Mom, can I have a bull-whip?" questions, though I have a small princess, too. And yes, girls are also fun.




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