I arrive at the beach for my run still feeling guilty about leaving Chinook at home. The weight of her perceived sorrow is one step behind me; she is a dog so she will get over it. In fact she may be happily sleeping this very moment.

If only forgetting were that easy. New questions skip through my bloodstream like a pebble on still water. Do we really “get over” wrongs that have been done to us? How do we know we are “healed”? The diameter of the rings created by the stone grows wider in my blood lake. I can almost see the ripple appear beneath my skin. Maybe “healed” isn’t the objective. What if it is “healing,” –as in ongoing, like the ocean in a constant ebb and flow? The rolling of the waves begins to settle over me, giving way to a more lucid view of the past that has shaped me. It is as if introspection serves as a ceremonial ablution and through that ritual the chokehold of shame is rinsed clean and makes room for me to see that I am not a victim. I am a survivor, but there’s more. I need to thrive, share, prevent. I can no longer stay quiet in this world, I have a voice and I feel it reverberate off my internal walls, making its slow climb upward until its melody can be heard all around.

(this is an excerpt from my Memoir, Tornado Warning)

Views: 23

Tags: IWS

Comment

You need to be a member of She Writes to add comments!

Join She Writes

Comment by Whitney Peckman on October 19, 2010 at 10:40am
That's exciting and I'll look fwd to reading Tornado Warning.
Comment by Elin Stebbins Waldal on October 19, 2010 at 8:49am
Thank you for both taking the time to read and comment on my excerpt Whitney. What you shared is truly just as I would hope the reader to feel and your articulation of this back to me quite literally made my morning!
I am independently publishing Tornado Warning, the publication date is slated for 2/1/11, and that is when it will be available in book stores and on Amazon via distribution. That being said, I will have books available mid-November through my website www.elinstebbinswaldal.com. The MS was sent to the printer and we just approved the blue lines yesterday so this is a very exciting time. Thanks again Whitney hope you have a wonderful day.
Comment by Whitney Peckman on October 19, 2010 at 4:36am
Conceptualizing healing process as the action of the wave seems nearly perfect to me. That both the pain and the healing process can overwhelm, wash over and eventually buoy you up is so powerful. The wave "reverberating off my internal walls", then gradually pushing the sea shell of your pain to the surface, part of you empty and emptied, part of you beautiful and valued - you've written such a gorgeous metaphor. Is the memoir published? I'd like to read it.

OUR LEADERS

Latest Activity

Cassandra Black posted a blog post

AMAZON’S Top 100 Best Sellers List: "Loving a Texan"

AMAZON’S Top 100 Best Sellers List: "Loving a Texan" Multicultural Romance, Part 5Thank you for placing “Loving a …See More
40 minutes ago
Profile IconElizabeth Wren, Kayann Short, Ph.D. and Julianne Palumbo joined a group
Thumbnail

Bloggers: Let's Make It Work!

Whether you are using blogging as a way to let the world get to know you, market your book, or prepare the world for your talents, the form offers so many options it can be overwhelming. Let's network and share approaches. Bloggers unite!See More
2 hours ago
Kayann Short, Ph.D. replied to the discussion 'What did you blog about today?' in the group Bloggers: Let's Make It Work!
"In helping my parents move, I've "inherited" boxes of family photographs and letters. Whenever I have a few minutes, I take something out of the box and try to relate it to something I already know about my family. Last week I found a…"
4 hours ago
A blog post by Janay Lampkin was featured

Pinterest Power!

 Ever find yourself logging on to your Pinterest account for quick…See More
5 hours ago

Members

Badge

Loading…

© 2015   Created by Kamy Wicoff.

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service