Writer's Butt

Proverbs 31:17

She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms.



Attention Writers: Beware of this raging epidemic, Writer’s Butt, not to be confused with writer’s block, which is also a dreaded disease.


Some of you might be saying what in the world is Writer’s Butt? Who are you kidding? You know exactly what I’m talking about. Call it what you may, middle age spread, chunky butt, or secretary saddlebags. But truth is, fat is fat, and being out of shape means exactly what it says, “out of shape.”


Up until the past few years I have always been very active. Though I drove around selling advertising for a living I was constantly in and out of my car and on the move. Things changed when I started staying at home seven years ago to write full-time.


Words don’t get on paper unless you sit down and put them there. Whether you’re typing on a computer or writing free hand, you’re sitting on your butt doing it. So… I just want to share with you my advice on how to get rid of “your” Writer’s Butt, simple, get off it.


How does one do that when their life’s desire is to write eight to ten hours a day? When I am in the throes of bringing one of my novels to life I don’t want the energy to stop. I know how hard it is to get the creative juices flowing again once you’ve stepped away for a while, so I just want to keep writing. If you sit for long periods at a time your chair should have a beeper that sounds when you’ve been on your rump too long: Beep… Beep…Warning! Too much sitting is hazardous to your health. Failure to heed this advice may cause seams to burst, blood clots to form, and arteries to explode.


All kidding a side, I love to write, but I also love to exercise. To push myself and feel the burn, well maybe that is a bit exaggerated, but it sounded good didn’t it? I do love the way I feel after working out. My choice of exercise has also been walking a couple of miles as many days of the week as I can possibly pull myself away from my computer. On cold winter days I walk on the treadmill or ride my stationary bike. I have worn more than one bike out in my many years of peddling.


A few months ago new neighbors moved in and suddenly there were five dogs nipping at my heels as I strolled by their house. For quite some time I had been thinking about joining a local “women’s only” gym so I can thank those dogs for pushing me in the direction of Circle For Fitness, located only a couple of miles from my house at 1802 North Bridge Street, Elkin, NC.


Almost three months ago I signed up for a one-month free trial. It was a bit awkward at first learning to use some of the machines, and even more disturbing when I heard a lady my age or older say she could work out on one of the step machines for thirty minutes. What, I thought I’d die after being on that high stepping monster for five minutes. Yes, that first week was humbling and enlightening. I had forgotten how many different muscles I have. Walking is wonderful, but it doesn’t work your entire body.


Another plus about going to the gym is it gives me a chance to socialize. Writers are known to hibernate, only going out when they absolutely have to. I had forgotten how much I enjoy the interaction between myself and other ladies. Even if I am not engaged in a conversation with someone I hear others telling stories and laughing. Laughter is good for the soul.


Yes, taking an hour a day, three to five times a week has been the best thing I’ve done for myself in a long, long time. I feel better knowing I am building up my bone density, I can wear some clothes that I haven’t been comfortable in for years, and the best part is I can actually tell the bat wings on my under arms have filled out with a little muscle.


Bottom line is this: Take time for yourself. Get up, do something, get active, don’t let your brain tell you you’re too old or too out of shape. Sometimes we need to step out of our comfort zone and dare to indulge our self in a few minutes of sweat and grind. A lady the other day told me this: I might be getting old, but I’m going to fight it every step of the way. Pretty good advice if you ask me.


Circle For Fitness is a wonderful place. The staff is friendly and helpful. You can do a vigorous workout, or you can stroll along at two miles an hour on the treadmill. The workout machines concentrate on using a variety of muscles in your body. They are not weight resistant they are hydro resistant, low impact on your joints. You can use the circuit machines, the treadmills, stationary bikes, ellipticals, stability balls, exercising bands or workout by choosing one of 40 different videos. They have workouts for seniors and for cardio strength and rehabilitation.


The best part is right now Circle For Fitness is offering a summer fitness discount for new members from June 2 through June 30. You can join for three months for only $100.00. There is no limit on how many times a week you can go. Shucks, you can workout twice a day if that’s what trips your trigger.


Whether you work it hard and fast, or slow and easy, at least you’re working it. Get up and get at it. You’ll be a better person inside and out because of it.


For more information contact Circle For Fitness at 336-526-7232 or visit their website at http://circleforfitness.com/



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  • diedre Knight

    This was too funny! And eerily close to home - yikes. I call it my 'lament of the poofy chair' because in all my years as a secretary I never had a comfortable chair. Now, working from home, I do have that luxury and unfortunately, a new concern! Thanks for the smiles!