Why Do I Have More Balls Than the Men I Date?
Written by
Pheona Phoks
September 2011
Written by
Pheona Phoks
September 2011

So I just found out this week that my whirl wind, fairy tale romance of less than 2 months had to end... why? Because he was "dating" other people. Ok long story, well, maybe not, but right now I need to make it clear - I know that "dating" means fucking. C'mon - really? Sigh. It was an amazing love story that ended like dropping a lit match into a glass of water. So why do I feel like I have more balls? Because you see said boyfriend had to leave to work in Calgary (Yes, Canada). I met him 2 weeks prior to this being confirmed. Since we fell so quickly and I know that this is possible to do I agreed to keep a few of his boxes and his car since he would be gone - save money on storage = love. Little did I know that he kept his Match.com account open (after he volunteered to close it). Let's just say he got to bragging to some co-workers that were there visiting the Calgary location... they came back, disclosed the info to my bff (who set us up) not knowing this and she passed the information to me. I then called my girlfriend (and yes I mean girlfriend because I seem to act like her bitch) and within 5 minutes found his trifling ass on Match.com active within the last 24 hours. I confronted him and he ended up coming clean. I have his car! Some of his shit! When the fuck was I going to find out that he was dating when it was his idea to be exclusive?!! Was I just going to be in his Bermuda Triangle of hoes? He goes to Alabama (his hometown) then Calgary then Houston... I ain't the one. I truly believe in divine intervention and I thank the Universe for bringing that information to me and placing in my lap. (and yes Beyonce and Babyface wrote my theme song for this... Best Thing I Never Had... this fool said he wants to marry me! LOL)

Balls... this brings me back to balls. Seems like men have all the balls in the world to tell a woman she's fat, unattractive or to even be unfaithful with her best friend. They have balls to ask for promotions and be successful in their careers as well as to go to war. But... BUT... when it comes to being up front and forthcoming about not really being able to be in a long distance relationship or a relationship period their balls suddenly retract and become ovaries. Sigh.

[Please visit my blog for this and many more crazy stories from my life]



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