• Nina Chong
  • "Walk." A poem/piece I wrote of damaged and deteriorated innocence.
"Walk." A poem/piece I wrote of damaged and deteriorated innocence.
Contributor
Written by
Nina Chong
December 2009
Contributor
Written by
Nina Chong
December 2009
how did I fall back into this house of glass shards. feeling small, and the world, so tall. wide-eyed and big-lashed a salty tear gliding down my face. Sun shining through the glass house of this broken space. my pretty blue dress in a tumultuous mess. bits of soil on my light blue skirt. I fluff up the underskirt trying to self-medicate the hurt. My black ribbon's falling, my hair's losing it's wave.. I make no sudden movements to preserve what I can save. I know it's coming. Rushing through me-an invisible wave. EXHALE. this wind brings a watery gaze. Don't give up. Pound the walls. Break the glass, scream my words!! Scream my words!.. C-C-can..I speak.No. Keep the whispers inside. The less you speak the less you have to admit, the less you need to submit to the wind's rushing lost pit. Keep shut. Keep quiet. Walk the lines in utter silence.. you can believe if you never stop walking. Step, step, pitter, patter around the greenhouse oblivious to her. It holds no prisoner. This is not a cell. The open spaces the shards cannot conceal let the sunshine in let the moonlight grin. Keep walking keep walking... Miles of talking. My thoughts fly 67 miles wide Eleventy-seven times I try to empty my brain and the creeps inside. In my restless mind they hide Keep walking, keep walking A shard pulling caught on my light blue skirt. Keep walking keep walking now it rips the sleeve of my shirt. Walk Forward Walk Forward! Don't look back! You can't! Don't turn around to the past it's too much for a girl to pass. Walk Forward. Walk Forward. Walk forward! keep walking! My light blue gone! The white underskirts showing! Keep running! In the moonlight I can see her sin I can see me crying out for redemption within For salvation to pain for a STOP in this game for her life! For my future! For her soul! For my life.. Keep walking keep walking.Keep walking keep walking. Stop talking. Stop talking stop talking. Quiet down, the dark is mocking me. Following me. Why doesn't all this feel so beautiful? How it stands in the moonlight and shines unprotectful of me. Grieves grab me by my center and my arms carried upward they like to watch me plead for mercy so they can laugh when I fall hard. When are you coming?! When will you save me? When will you be here so I can run from these needles? So I stop hanging from this glass.. So I can be as I seem.. So my unscratched skin can to my heart become akin. Ready for your blood to save me. Watching under the moon. Looking up through the shards of glass. Watery eyed and long lashed. Ribbon falling-- my heart falling fast. Heart falling fast. Stop walking stop walking. STOP WALKING. Look up. The emotion clamoring inside me will never come out.. I won't yell, it's my fault. I close my eyes, the stars drop. I bury them. Goodbye shine. I'm looking up at midnight waiting for the SON to burn.. SON BURN. SON BURN!! Heat up the glass so it explodes! Take me with you from this world! Cuz when it's not me my heart aches for this world.. for the people it holds. For the souls that it holds. For the people he controls. God is there more than hope?! More than Faith with which I cope!? Because Your Love is bringing me through but I am dying as I hope. Crying as I praise your name in worship.. Lying to myself in nights when I can't force this.. You are surely strength because alone I tragically fall. & though you're with me in my heart I feel lonely on this walk. walk walk walk.. Keep walking.....keep walking.. stop talking.. keep walking.. Lasting.Drastically.Happily but tragically. I guess that's what makes her special in the bright moonlight. In the dark of my night. In the pit of my plight.. In this blinding sight in my immaculate sky in my dark blue world in His bright and shining Word. Look up..look up...look up.. Keep walking with your eyes in the eyes of The Father. Keep walking with my eyes in the eyes of My Father. "..I will guide you with my eye.." Psalm 32:8. Looking. Waiting. Watching. Walking.. I wish..break it all, break it all. But I buried my stars.. So I can walk. So He can save me. I've been walking so far..

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Comments
  • Alexandra Vonelli

    ... That was so beautiful, such a graceful and vivid use of words. I feel like I sort of understood it, but who am I to say I understand what you were feeling when you wrote this? Either way, it was lovely and the length was amazing, how did your mind keep going like that. Astounding, honestly!