Get Shit Done
Contributor
Written by
Ena Fejzagic
June 2017
Contributor
Written by
Ena Fejzagic
June 2017

Someone asked me the other day what I would change about me if I had a magic wand. I wanted to say something sarcastic, but in the end I just said: I would want to be more brave to do bigger things in life. The second I said it out loud, I thought about how silly it was. Who and what is stopping me from doing it now? Do I really need a magic wand for that to start happening, or is the wand already in my hands?

I stand by my ground when I say that sometimes life is just shit. Especially for us with ‘first-world problems’. Shitty weather, shitty jobs, shitty apartments, shitty relationships. But, how many times did you actually do something about it? Let’s be real, we complain and whine, but we still don’t do shit about it.

There are different reasons for it. For some, such as myself, there is a certain level of safety and stability in being part of Generation Grumpy. If I try to do something outside of the lines, I might get disappointed, criticized, hurt, or (oh, the horror!) I might realize that I am not good enough. This way, I can always keep the illusion that I would have been an amazing writer, for example, but I did not have a chance to prove it. Therefore, I’m not a failure, I just wasn’t lucky enough. So, me and my Gen G pals are safely trapped in the cynical bubble, where we mock those who try to actually DO things. It’s actually so easy to live by the rules of unvarying world (Jobs suck. Men cheat. Diets don’t work. Life is shit.). So, Monday mornings are our Christmas; the moaning is socially approved. We get to have our favourite kind of small talk while waiting for the much needed coffee. – How was the weekend? – Short. – How are you doing? – Same shit, different day.

Now, for others, the reason for not changing anything is simply because they are lazy. The modern times not only encourage laziness, they glorify it. The coach potato philosophy spreads outside of the living room. We’re too lazy to live our lives and shrug when asked what we want the future to look like. So, life shrugs, as well, then. The reality becomes an endless routine and we become useless species which waste air on this planet. You know the drill: I might just stay home tonight and watch Netflix. I’ll order in, because I’m too lazy to go out for a proper meal, or, God forbid, cook. I will lie on the couch simultaneously scrolling through Facebook and watching yet another TV show. Online shopping for groceries, clothes, or even furniture. Wasn’t I supposed to read something for the exam next week? Tomorrow, perhaps. There is still time.

Another group of not-doers are the ‘as soon as’ crew. I guess there is something just so compelling about that magical place in the future when the stars will align and let you make that step. Maybe it will be a Hollywood moment with some cool indie music in the background to make it nothing less than perfect? Or, things will simply be so much more different (better) than they are now. I will start writing that blog as soon as the summer is over. I will go for a trip around the world as soon as I start earning and saving enough money. My relationship will be much better as soon as he gets a job. Tell me, how many of you actually witnessed that ‘as soon as’ moment coming true? Isn’t it a way of life, more than an actual promise to oneself (and others)? It’s a pretty little fantasy, making us think we are still keeping it positive and upbeat, as we would love to change something, but now is simply not the right time (and it never is).

And then, there’s my all time favourite. The Startups. It’s New Years, and it’s time for some resolutions! I bought a beautiful diary and wrote down all the things I will change this year. Then, I did a quick research on that masters degree I want to enroll in this year. I joined all discussion groups about that school and made a plan for financing my tuition. I sent an email to the Student Office, asking to send me information about this year’s entrance exam and application. I Googled the degree and my career options with it. I even told my friends, unshakable in carrying out this decision with overly optimistic predictions of my own will power. But, all ideas have an expiration date. As the weeks go by, the enthusiasm drops down. ‘I can do this’ turns into ‘I’m really tired today, I will work on it tomorrow’ which then slowly turns into ‘Perhaps, I don’t need this in my life’ and ends with ‘That masters degree is just too expensive, but this Spanish course looks so great! I’m off to buy notebooks and dictionaries, and I already downloaded all Gipsy Kings songs. Baila, baila, baila…’. I wonder what ever happened to good old consistency?

Do you know why they call it ‘procrastination’? The time you spend spelling, writing or pronouncing the word correctly, is already procrastination. So, please, let’s stop fooling ourselves that we have no time, no hope, no reason, or not enough will to do something about the shitty lives we have. Stop reading this and go get your CV fixed. Move to another country. Leave that good-for-nothing idiot. Go for that trip to Thailand you talk about every year. Write that master thesis. Change your shithole apartment. Join that stupid gym, you see every day on your way to the bar. Get that lump checked. Read that book you bought 3 years ago. Learn how to play that fuckin guitar. Get. Shit. Done.

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