Writing Your Next Book
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When you start writing your new book you feel more prepared for the process. You think you’re ready and well-equipped. You think you’re well informed, and you think you know what the whole journey ahead will look like. You know what to expect. It seems clear. You write, you write more, you revise, you edit, you edit again, you hire an editor, then you edit some more, and finally, your book is ready for the publication and is published. If you break down the whole process into the stages and generalize, it’s that simple and that hard. The trick is to actually get to that final stage avoiding nervous breakdown, and as far as I know right now, while I’m working on the first draft of my second novel, each and every day I realize more and more that it’ll need much of the nerve, much of persistence, much of rewrites, much of battling with ever growing self-doubts, much of the motivation and believing that I'll get  get through it.

    Writing your next book might sometimes feel as a trap you’re deliberately putting yourself into. It feels like a game you’re playing with yourself, trying to prove that this time, it’ll be easier, it is a challenge you force yourself to first face and then slowly overcome, and  the more you write, more challenging, more demanding it becomes. The more you write the louder the voice of the critic inside you doubting and trashing down the idea of the book, the concept, the pace, the characters is and at some point you’re starting to panic that after all, there are millions of wonderful books out there, and chances are, you’re wasting your time, you could use your talent for something else, say, learning a new language, or finally getting your hands into planting a bunch of roses in your garden, thus doing something creative but maybe slightly less demanding.

"Maybe you just had one story inside you and you’ve written it already?", Says the critic, sending you an overwhelming emotion of fear, destroying those minuscule pieces of confidence you tried so hard to hold on to and unfortunately, often during those first stages of writing your new book, the critic wins all the rounds of that little war. Strangely, the experience you’ve gained while writing your first novel both helps you and at the same time, that same experience to a certain point throws you back. It’s harder to be free, you’re more cautious this time; you’re more carefully choosing words you write. You care.  You’re responsible.  You feel that the ease of writing is gone, you’re thinking more, plotting more and rewriting, rewriting, rewriting until something switches in you, and the fear of failure transforms into fear of not having enough time to tell the new story, you’re slowly starting to enjoy the process, and you fear to not accidentally miss all the details,  the overtones, the nuances you want to put in your new project. Occasionally, you even laugh while reading your writing, you wake up in the middle of the night, determined to finish your book, you switch on your computer and you start to write, and there’s only you and your writing and nothing else matters, time freezes.  You know that there are at least three people who’ll definitely read your book and that alone keeps you going, keeps you wanting to tell the story. The world, even if that "world"  is yet  realtively small as an audience is waiting for reading your new book, which means it's worth a crazy journey. 

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