Okay, girl.  Walk with me, talk with me.  I've seen the enemy.  It is that moptop that you call a hairdo staking its claim on top of your dome.  Can you, please, get it together?

That had been my inner dialogue for more years than I care to count.  It was a little sad being a woman of a certain age and only having TWO styles in my natural hair care repertoire.  It was, certainly, a long battle of learning to love the mop on my top.  I'm happy to announce that I have won the war!  The love I battled for is a sweet cold glass of lemonade during a July heatwave.  It is sweet, refreshing, and satisfying!  

However, I was too busy dodging bombs and bullets in the war for self appreciation.  I never learned to correctly care for my coils au naturale.  I was started on relaxers before I was old enough to not count on my fingers.  Ya girl was hooked!  I adored the styles I could achieve.  I forgot that I ever had kinks.  I kept regular salon appointments, and I will never forget the night that I learned the pre-bedtime hair-wrapping secret to success.  

Oh!  I felt so much glee knowing that I was protecting my hair with headscarf armor.  But, after many years of that the damage began to show.  I couldn't accessorize a chemically induced receding hairline.  That isn't a good look for me!  So, I made the decision to learn to love my natural hair.

As great as that decision was I never learned to care for it properly.  I did get to the point where I could joyfully rock an afro without shame.  I could do it better than your momma's, best friend's, little sister during her disco darling days!  Still, that didn't mean I understood how to best care for my coils.  Fast-forward to many years later, and I have FINALLY decided to get out of my hair rut.

I'm ready to learn, master!  May I be the student to your teacher?

Granted, I am no beautician, but did you know that hair as thirsty as mine thrives when watered?  I know, right?!  One doesn't need to be a detective to solve that mystery.  One would think that would have been obvious to me previously.  I'm just now figuring this out, girl!  

I'm also learning that I can attain gorgeous styles without toxic chemicals, paying a professional (though, at times, I feel like I'm gonna NEED "professional help" trying to learn my hair...girl!), or lots of cash money.  I only need a little tender love and care with a side of patience.  I anticipate having temper tantrums in the future.  I'll want to reach for the scissors on impulse.  Then, I will take a breath.  

I will make a cup of chai tea.  I will add my favorite honey and almond milk for flavor.  I will reflect on what I love about my hair between each sip.  I will take another breath.  I will try again.  If I can still hold a wide tooth comb in one hand and moisturizer in the other I will treat these curls better...root to tip.