Groups / Query Critique / Hope I am not exploiting...
Poets don’t hesitate to speak of love. Psychotherapists, on the other hand, seldom whisper the word. The themes and stories in LOVE OUTSOURCED evolved from my 30 years as a psychotherapist. At the center of Love Outsourced is the radical yet obvious notion of child abuse as a traumatic experience of love. This viewpoint changes everything. It demands that love be central in the discourse about therapy, central in how we come to understand the complex relationships we forge with our clients.
LOVE OUTSOURCED is a book of narrative non-fiction. It is a sequence of stories from my clients’ lives interwoven with stories from my life as we both attempt to understand and repair damage from childhoods where what we learned about love was terribly flawed.
I am a frequent presenter at local and international conferences including International Society for the Study of Traumatic Stress and the International Society of Trauma and Dissociation. I have written articles for professional journals and book reviews for the Journal of Trauma and Dissociation. I have had many opportunities to collaborate and participate on panels with my colleagues from many parts of the world. I am fortunate to have the support and regard of many of the leaders in my field. I believe my professional reputation will be an asset in promoting LOVE OUTSOURCED.
In addition to the art of therapy, I am deeply committed to the art of writing. I received my MFA in Creative Non fiction in 2010.
Presently my manuscript is 55,000 words. I will be adding an introduction and expanding the last section.
I am interested in working with you because you care about creative non-fiction with a purpose. My book LOVE OUTSOURCED is filled with rich narratives that can also make a difference in peoples lives.
Laurie,
I am an English teacher and college instructor. With the agents I have queried they seek to see the writer's passion for writing and their confidence in what they write and that is evident in your query.
I'd like to suggest from a grammatical/convention standpoint some revisions:
Now, there's a beginning that hooked me! Good job, Laurie:))
If I were you, I'd take Sarah's well-thought suggestions and run with this baby. Don't change anything else. Just add a bit of what she's challenging you to do.
Answer, simply, the question--why don't psychotherapists seldom whisper the word (great use of words by the way)? Think about it, because you, with all your expertise in the field, know the answer. I love how you've tied your hook into your title, Love Outsourced.
I love the new direction of the lead. But as a layperson, when I read the 2nd sentence I thought: really? why don't they?
Can you try to answer that question?
Also, instead of using psychotherapist in the third sentence, try substituting "seeing patients." It's more personal, and also less repetitive.