"I remember when..."

My undergraduate creative writing class both inspired and nearly crushed my goal of publishing my dreams. I am not speaking about dreams as in aspirations and goals; I am speaking about the dreams we have when we are asleep - be it at night or during a nap. It was a magical realism class. I wanted to explore genres that could possibly be a good fit for sharing my dreams, their messages, and the experiences around them. 

If my dreaming experiences ceased between then and now, I would have dropped the idea of publishing. 16 years later, my dream experiences are as robust and vivid as they have always been. Yes, being lucid in dreams is as natural as breathing, so of course, I found it appalling when everyone laughed in class at my stories. They thought it fantasy; I knew it to be truth. You don't laugh about someone naturally breathing, do you?

I almost allowed myself to be reduced to a character out of a fantasy novel. If it were not for the comforting words of encouragement from a classmate, who knows what would have become of my writer's pen. 

But what IS a good genre for dreams? Perhaps all of them are. It really boils down to what is being shared, and how. In my case, the genre is not one, but many. It is not only a spiritual memoir, or autobiography, women's spirituality or goddess spirituality, history, creative nonfiction, or transpersonal psychology. It is a little bit of all of the above. 

So what publisher would even consider a query and proposal, let alone a manuscript [in progress] that encompasses all of the above? Perhaps, one that states they are looking for material that "break boundaries" and pushes the envelope? 

I am a newbie to this publishing business, mind you. There was an MFA program I was enrolled in, once-upon-a-time, and ended up dropping out because I could not "conform" to the structure of writing that was built-in to the program. I wanted to discover which genre fit best with what I wanted to share, not try to fit into a ready-made mold. My life never followed that example. Why would - or should - my writing? Before anyone says "Know the rules before breaking them", I'd like to offer context. I am not trying to write within a genre. Knowing how to write and knowing how to write within a genre are not mutually exclusive. 

John Hunt Publishing seemed like a great fit - would my idea be of any interest? Would it be worth seeking out a publisher to work with, or would self-publishing be the better option? So I submitted a query to one of their imprints. I did not - and still do not - have a finished manuscript; it was a submission of an idea that would either sink or swim. 

Surely some of you can relate to the anxiety of whether or not your submission would be accepted, moving you on to the next phase? For a couple of days, my heart skipped a beat at every email notification, "Is that it? Is that their response? Should I check my email right away?" 

Silly me...

Yes, my pitch - or query - was accepted. After submitting a formal proposal, I then received the news I kind of expected - a contract with a subsidy. With the amount they were requesting, I might as well self-publish. 

I wasn't devasted. I was pleased; pleased that at the very least there is potential, a possibility. I made it past the first step. Now, I need to work on the manuscript.

And developing a platform...and perhaps a presence. Because really, who am I? In the vast sea of writers and aspiring authors who am I, really? 

A priestess carrying within the very fabric of her being mysteries - knowledge - from antiquity; knowledge that was once at the very foundation of civilizations from the deep, distant past. A priestess that did not become a priestess because I was inspired to be devoted to the mysteries of a deity; I am priestess because I was created out of the mysteries of a deity. The two are not mutually exclusive.